Real, Raw, Relevant

If you asked me in a conversation "how many Facebook friends do you have?", to my shame now and over the years of being on social media, I could probably answer you exactly, to the number.

I wonder if you are like me and now think that is kind of weird?

This strange I guess pathological desire or need to have a large so-called friend group.

To have a platform, an audience, a crowd that we hope we can impress on some level and desperately hope that will cheer us on.

As part of this current life and recovery journey I have been on I have learned again that in regards to friends, and I mean true friends, less in not a bad thing. It is actually the best thing!

Quantity is definitely not guaranteed to bring quality. 

And "the right" friends is so much more conducive to my recovery.

Maybe you buck this trend...well good for you!

But sadly most of us have drunk the cool-aid.

We get some sense of value from having as many social media friends as possible.

The idea that maybe lots of friends will make you "feel" more accepted, valued and even encouraged.

As a Pastor our time is strangely split between crowds and one on one interactions.

Sundays or specials events is your crowd moment face to face. 

Then we have a crowd we have following our blogs, listening to our podcasts, watching our 'gram' pics with our ministry highlights.

One on one we seek to help those wrestling with whatever they are facing. Hoping our advice/ministry
could be the difference maker in that moment.

We ride a paradox of never alone and yet sometimes feeling very alone.

When our 'ministry' came to a screeching halt last year this all became very real, raw and relevant for me to somehow deal with, to navigate out of, and build a slightly different existence.

I discovered that friends who I thought were friends simply weren't.

I discovered the crowds disappeared like a chocolate bar in our home - very quickly!

And I also discovered something very cool...

I will come back to that very soon - but first can I talk about this Jesus guy (please don't freak out if he is not your thing right now)?

The other day I was driving home from one of my many part time contract roles I do now. Thinking about how this Jesus guy was purportedly the greatest person ever to exist and yet he didn't have many friends!

History tells us he picked 12 guys to be his disciples and learn from him. And when it came to very personal and special moments, he only included a small group of 3.

Was it because he was not cool? Was his social media cred not on point?

I realised that Jesus had a few close friends because that is what worked best for him.

And I have learned in this season that a few great friends is all I really need.

Jesus example I think is a great example for us all...

I have some amazing people in my life right now.

People I feel I can be real, raw and relevant with.

I would name them but that would probably embarrass them. 

They have made all the difference for me and I am extremely grateful.

Maybe you recognise the trap now that might have been set for you?

That bait of popularity, of persona based on nothing more than a reader digest highlight real.

Maybe you feel lonely in the crowd?

My friend don't do anything rash, simply focus on have a few great friends. Cultivate a few special friendship where you can be real, raw and relevant with.

In my opinion it is far healthier and will help you navigate life so much better.

Something to think about...

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